Prison guard gets into drunken fight with his wife, and attempts to remove wedding ring by shooting it off. You know, because THAT makes sense.

Alfred Malesini III

Courtesy of SF Gate:  

A federal prison guard has been charged with shooting his own finger in a drunken attempt to remove his wedding ring during an argument with his wife at their northwestern Pennsylvania home, police said. 

A criminal complaint said Bradford police were called just before 9 p.m. March 2 and were met by Alfredo Malespini III, 31, who told officers he was "trying to get rid of his wedding ring" and decided to "shoot it off." The Bradford Era first reported the shooting on Friday. 

The gunshot badly mangled Malespini's finger, but didn't remove the ring, police said. 

The only upside to this story that I can think of, besides the inherent humor of it, is how fortunate it is that this guy focused on removing the ring in order to signify his displeasure with his marriage and did not decide to use the gun to remove his wife, which, to be honest, is the purpose for which the weapon was created.

One of my major bitches about owning a weapon, which due to this man's job it would seem he had every right to own, is that it places absolute power in the hands of those unable to effectively deal with that power. Young children are immediately given the ability to end a life, as are angry people, drunk people, and people with a mental illness which impairs their ability to differentiate fantasy from reality.

Guns are not tools for solving a problem.

Nor are they a magical shield to protect you from harm,

They are designed to do one thing, and that is to effectively end the life of another human being.

You would think, even under the influence of alcohol, that a prison guard would understand this fact.